How to raise issues: Observation + Impact + Request
Also, upcoming classes and turkey facts!
Dear Newsletter Friends,
Happy November! This month I have for you:
Negotiation classes. Interested in upcoming classes? Fill out this short survey.
Negotiation tip of the month. How to raise issues: Observation + Impact + Request
Writing news. I was selected as the 2023 Writer in Residence at Porter Square Books in Cambridge, MA!
Turkey facts. Facts about the average turkey.
Negotiation tip of the month
Ineffective way to raise an issue: “You are so loud and it’s driving me crazy! How am I supposed to get anything done?”
Effective way to raise an issue: Observation + Impact + Request
Observation: Something factual that the other person would agree with, establishing a shared understanding of the situation.
Impact: How this affects you in a way the other person would care about.
Request: A proposed solution or an invitation to problem-solve together.
For a coworker: “I’ve noticed your music has gotten louder over the past few days, and I’m having trouble concentrating on my work. Would you be willing to wear headphones?”
For a kid: “When you yell while I’m trying to work, I get distracted and it takes me longer to finish my work. What can we do about this?”
Note for caregivers: I highly recommend mutual problem-solving with kids! They often have unexpected explanations and creative solutions. In this case, your kid might say, “I HAVE to yell when I play video games,” and the solution could be a different activity while you’re working. Or “I only yell because you’re so loud on your work calls,” in which case the solution could be for you to relocate temporarily when you’re on a call.
Writing news
I am delighted to announce that starting in February, I will be the Writer in Residence at Porter Square Books in Cambridge! Hanging out in an indie bookstore with dedicated writing space and even getting to make staff picks? Dream come true. More in February! (Note, no money is involved, so I will continue lawyering whilst writing my novel and working on my negotiation book proposal.)
Turkey facts
The average turkey weighs 18 pounds and his name is George. George knows he will never be special. His mother always told him so. “Ach, ye’ll never be more than average, George, lord love ya,” she would say. Her voice echoes in the back of his head. He stayed up all night once, rehearsing Valjean’s Soliloquy, but the next day he saw the line of turkeys waiting to audition and trotted away.
The end
And don’t forget: Interested in upcoming negotiation classes? Fill out this short survey.